You just don’t know how to react to that. Marriage isn’t about space. It’s about two people who love each other working towards a shared future. If one partner wants space that can only mean one thing right? It means your wife isn’t feeling as satisfied as she could be within the relationship. As difficult as it may be to accept that, you have to. If you don’t, and you just ignore the fact that she wants some space and time for herself, you’re going to end up alone when she walks out for good. Dealing with a wife who is feeling dissatisfied requires insight and a thoughtful approach.

If your wife says she needs space listen to her. Don’t pretend that it’s a passing phase or that she’s just upset about something in the moment. A woman typically won’t express her desire for some time away from her husband unless there is a serious issue at hand. Space is often what a person asks for when they are unsure of their feelings or the direction their life is heading. They essentially want to take a step back from things so they can gain a clearer perspective and can sort through what their heart really desires.

Ask your wife what you can do to help her during this time. You need to be genuine when you do this and not have any ulterior motives at play. If you’re trying to trick her into telling you what is bothering her, chances are that it won’t work. She’ll be able to see through your veiled attempts to get her to change her mind and it will make her more determined than ever to create some emotional and physical distance between the two of you.

Acknowledge and accept what she tells you about what she’s feeling. If she’s insistent on taking some time apart, offer her any assistance you can. Maybe all she wants is a chance to go away for the weekend for some solitude. Or perhaps her idea of space is a temporary separation. Listen carefully to what she tells you she needs. You must look past the pain of this moment and try to imagine how the space can actually help you both.

Often when a couple does take some time apart it becomes apparent to them both that it’s the last thing they really want. Within days of each taking their space they feel a void that leaves them empty and alone. It’s possible that this will happen in your own marriage if you and your wife do reach a decision to separate for a time. A short term absence can truly make your wife’s heart grow fonder.