When you first got together, she was totally into you. She wanted to be with you all the time. She said she couldn’t stand to be anywhere other than where you are.
All of her attention was focused on you. Everything you said or did was wonderful to her and she told you so.
It felt like heaven. She was your dream girl and you were her guy. You thought about her all the time.
Where Did the Dream Girl Go?
Now though things are different. You still think about her all the time and want to be with her, but her priorities have changed a few years into the marriage or so. Now she always wants to be with friends.
Meantime you’re sitting there wondering what happened and how you got pushed out of the picture. Is she just bored with you? Is she having an affair? Is this how marriage turns out? What is she telling her friends about you… is she ragging on you behind your back to your friends?
You’re Beginning to Think Maybe the Marriage Is Over
It’s natural that you’re beginning to question the future of your marriage. Things certainly are different now and you don’t like it. This isn’t what you expected and you’re not happy with the outcome.
If this is what marriage is about you wonder why you got into it. You could be lonely all by yourself without having to worry about whether she was with some other guy or much more into her friends than she is into you.
You Want to Stay Married But Not Like This
Is there anything you can do to get her back and get the love back like it used to be? Or is this just all you can expect of marriage? Maybe it’s like your father and grandfather said, after the Honeymoon, don’t expect much.
You’re not even having much sex anymore, and you wonder if it’s the influence of those girlfriends of hers kind of warning her off of guys and having an attitude like sex is just what pig men want.
You’re going to have to take some action, that much I can tell you for sure. You’re not happy and it’s time to do something different. Here’s a plan for you. You may or may not like it, but it’s worked for many guys willing to take a chance.
Four Steps to Save The Marriage
You must take four steps to save the marriage right now. I call those steps “LOVE,” which is an acronym. “L” is for like; “O” is for openness; “V” is for value; and “E” is for encourage
Sit down and write out the 10 things you like about her and the way she is right now!
Not the way she used to be, but the way she is currently. You can share those with her, and that’s a good idea.
This involves recognizing that you have contributed to her not being as interested in you as she used to be and that you have changed too.
Write down 10 ways you’ve contributed to her being more interested in her friends than in you. What have you done that has reduced her interest in you? You might say “nothing,” but you’d be wrong.
People hang around others who give the great value for the connection. She’s hanging out with her friends and more interested in them because she’s getting more from them than she is from you.
Write down 10 things to give her more value from being with you, and then do them. Mind you they need to be things she thinks are valuable and appreciates, not just things you think she should value.
This probably sounds really weird, but encourage her to be with her friends and enjoy that time with them. It sounds backwards, but it’s not. What it means and says is that you are really interested in her being happy, and that you don’t want to strangle her or bind her to you. She will appreciate that and once you get used to it, you’ll see how important it is.
Follow these four Steps just as I have outlined them here, and you’ll find that you don’t have to sit there worrying or being frustrated that things aren’t like they used to be. Maybe, just maybe, you’ll have something even better with your Dream Girl than ever before. What do you have to lose?